Thursday, April 26, 2012
My Precious Time
Before I have my baby, already I'm so lack of time.. I need so much time to finish what I want to do. Be it for leisure purposes or work purposes. Now that I have my Baby Ayden with me, I'm more in need of time.. Mostly now, time for myself and time for rest. I can't imagine after my leave, how am I going to juggle between work life, family life and my own 'happy hour' life..
Cried yesterday night.. And also the night before.. Baby Ayden hasn't been a very good boy at night recently. It's hard to describe what I'm going through.. I just have to be woken up by him every 15 minutes.. Previous night, I slept for 4h only. Last night, 2h. I felt so frustrated with him! Why can't he be like my friends' babies who can sleep throughout the night? What's going to happen when I get back to work? How to manage when I still need to wake up like this at night? I just hope that he will grow out of this quickly and be able to sleep through..
Having not enough sleep is killer for me. I get frustrated easily. But how to be angry with an innocent baby? So I got angry with myself.. I am the one who wanted a child.. So this is what I have to go through! Last night, I told myself that I'm not going to go through all these all over again.. So Baby Ayden will stay as the only child! I don't care what others are going to say.. I just hope he grows up quickly so that I can have part of my life back..
Apart from all these rant, of course I still love my son.. How to not love him when I see all these?
And please forget the photos of me above without makeup.. Here's two that look better with makeup.. 
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